The loss of my dad and my quest for understanding the afterlife

March 31, 2023

The loss of my dad and my quest for understanding the afterlife

After losing my dad, my grief took over my entire life. He was diagnosed with cancer very late. He just wanted to go home, so without question, that's what we did. We were told he had a couple of months. We were hopeful for that, but he only had five days. We weren't prepared and had no experience. We did the best we could. He declined so rapidly. When he passed there were so many feelings. What just happened?! There was guilt that I didn't care for him well enough in those last days and hours. Sadness of a life without him. My own fears of death started to surface as I faced my own mortality. I had so many questions and no answers.

Not knowing where to turn, I began searching online in hope of finding others with these same feelings. I needed to learn how to cope with all of these emotions that I was in no way equipped to deal with. This led me to Alua Arthur and her Going With Grace - End Of Life Training course. I had never heard of a Death Doula before and I was intrigued. I signed up for the course and through learning how to care for the dying, I found my way back to living. I learned that it was okay to forgive myself. I learned how to do better in the future. I'm prepared now with a strong back and a soft front, to stand on my own and to help others who can't. I discovered books, videos and documentaries that brought me total comfort, acceptance and peace.

Another big part of my journey was wanting to know about the afterlife, I watched every documentary I could find and read several books about people who have died and come back, with a remembering of their experience on the other side. I wrote down every little bit that resonated with my soul. Every bit of experience from others that I felt could help me now. Not only do I not fear death, I look forward to what awaits. I'm in no rush though! I've always felt deep gratitude for this experience.

I don't believe that just reading my notes will help you, it's in the full stories that clarity comes. So, I'm also sharing a list of all of the documentaries I watched that helped me. This path isn't the only way and it isn't for everyone. If you have fears and lack solid beliefs, I encourage you to face those fears, search, discover and find what brings you comfort. The journey different for all of us.

What you believe, is your reality.

The Oneness and Purpose of Spirit Beings

Lead with love and do no harm.

Lead every action and reaction, with Love.

Love one another.

Help one another.

Go into nature.

Connect with God/Source.

Be like a child; remain curious and optimistic.

Be kind, compassionate and loving to every living thing; every thing is a living thing.

Learn lessons from your mistakes.

Be grateful.

Shh. Listen.

Do not judge others or yourself.

Look for the good in others and yourself.

Appreciate and Respect others and yourself.

Think only positive thoughts towards others and yourself.

We are all divine beings; don't forget your divinity, don't forget your humanity.

Find a way to live your life with purpose; find a way to be in service for the collective.

Each morning you wake up, you have all you need.

*****

God spoke to her and said,

“You are the rock.

You are the light.

The light is of me

and I am with you.”

The rock is dropped into the water and the ripple is created.

“The water is mankind and you are the ripple. Your thoughts, words and actions will affect mankind.”

*****

It's up to us if we choose to shine this light or not. This is our gift of free will. We can choose to connect with God or not. There is no judgement from God, whatsoever. He will not judge us for our wrong doings but it brings great sadness. Our free will is to choose a life with God or not. He wants us to choose him and to choose love.

Love is life's theme. Love is all that matters and is all that we can take with us. [when we cross over we feel the unconditional love from the collective and from God.]

Reconnect with the child within... be joyful, bubbly and grateful for everything; every breath, every bite, every step, every joy, every pain. Live life with an enormous optimism.

As far as the eyes can see are the records of everything, everything. There are also presents. They are all unique, a variety of sizes, shapes, wrapping and bows. These are gifts that God has for everyone of us. All we have to do is ask for them. But then we have to be quiet and listen. This is how we receive them.

He won't make you feel bad for times you derailed and perhaps drank too much or missed a big test or work meeting. He's only concerned with the times you aren't kind to other people. He'll show you how your actions made them feel. Always look for the good in others, don't focus on things that cause you to judge them. You don't need to love them or be their best friend but you do always need to show them respect.

Our emotions are so much more than what we've been told they are. They are a compass, a navigator, an integration tool, the way that our body communicates with us and the world around us. They speak to us more quickly than our mind. When we deny the negative emotions we're feeling they get stuck in our body and manifest deeper and can result in health and mental problems.

Our thoughts and unspoken intentions stick to others just as words and actions do. Send healing and kind thoughts out to everyone. Breath in the bad to your healing heart space, convert it to love and exhale that intention out to the collective.

The trauma, tragedy, pain and abuse are here to show us how not to be. Use these as a mirror. Thank the universe for the lesson and let go of the story. What does your mirror reflect back to the world? How to be or how not to be?

Transitioning to a higher vibration can feel lonely. It's just the letting go of the old self and the old habits. Low vibrational activities and thoughts are so heavy; let go and feel the lightness of connecting to your purpose.

Our reality is becoming more and more dehumanizing with society's singular focus on maximizing profit. In this system, everything we should be valuing gets sacrificed to goal of profit. If we don't fit in this role we are not valued by our society. We will continue down this path until we as a society, acknowledge this and shift our collective goals.

*****

When we die...

* The soul feels unconditional love, it feels like it has been set free and is returning home.

* We then pass through a portal and the first person we meet is our guide aka angel.

(if we have a soul mate we will also see them first with our guide)

* We then reunite with our soul group, which is comprised of 3-25 souls we have spent many lifetimes learning with.

* We then go over a life review: what we learned and what we still need to work on for our next incarnation.

* We can choose to rest, visit other planets or reincarnate right away.

(more advanced souls tend to choose more difficult lives because they know that's a way they can evolve the fastest)

Reincarnation with Family Purpose: The family is reborn into the same family... breaking the trauma cycles now helps the next rebirth to get closer to ascension and so on.

*****

There is a spiritual battle and the war is over your soul, so stay connected to your heart and soul, spiritual warrior. However that much darkness we are willing to face now, that much light will follow. ~ Laura Matsue

Life isn't about what happens to you, it's about how you respond to it.

It's not fear that actually keeps us trapped. It's hiding fear that keeps us trapped. Say out loud what your fears are and re-anchor yourself in the present moment.

Documentaries:

I Survived: Beyond and Back

(found on Hulu and the free Tubi app)